PERSONAL. Fauna. One month.
Everybody says: Enjoy this time when they are so tiny because it goes away really fast and you will miss it.
Yes; I know I will miss it. The same way I already feel nostalgia for the pregnancy period. But the truth to be told, it took me two weeks to be able to really enjoy Fauna. To observe her when she sleeps. To laugh with her honest and ridiculous face expression. To be relaxed when she cries. To talk to her sweetly.
The beginning was too intense for me. For everybody else too, I guess. It is hard: the breast dependency she has, the lack of intimacy with Manfred, the missing time for myself (and well, for everything else too)... But now I feel different. I feel in control and balance. I am in a better mood and I have fun being alone with her while Manfred works. I manage to cook and to make the laundry. I even manage to blog!! Of course, with Fauna sleeping over my lap.
She is already growing. Little, but not so little as in the beginning. Sleeping less, and therefore, experiencing boredom. Having new face expressions and giving me the impression that she is looking into my face. I'm almost sure that she recognize my voice and Manfred's too. But who knows...
Yesterday we felt the biggest satisfaction since she is born. She smiled for the first time. It was really nice that Manfred and me were looking at her in this very moment.
After so much crying and sleeping, smiling is a huge reward. Well, she didn't repeat it since then. We have to wait for the next reward.
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